Resolutions...

Well here we are! 2013 who would have thunk it? We survived the End of the World, Christmas and New Year and are now all have bills coming out of our rear-ends. Merry fucking Christmas everyone!

With the new year comes a whole bucket load full of resolutions. So far, my biggest resolution was to complete what was on the list from last year; be healthy, exercise more, eat less sugar, save money, travel, be happy.

I started my year hung-over as shit, broke, and lying around the house for 3 days watching every season of Friday Night Lights and eating every take-away under the sun- WIN! You go girl! (Please note I was childless for 5 nights - this isn't a regular occurrence with child present!!) So with the feeling of inadequacy, fatness and brokeness I began my resolution on Monday 7th January. Insurance bill paid, and half of my credit card debt cleared things were starting to look up. I had money in the bank from work (well enough to buy groceries.. sigh) and I was keen as a bean to get back into the grind of my fitness routine. I'd also started a "detox" diet on the Sunday, so I was feeling pretty good. Still feeling great and going strong, minus the night where I lost my shit and ate half a cherry ripe.. My bad. I figure cherries are fruit, coconut is good for you and chocolate is dairy so I was just fulfilling my daily requirements from food table....

Another thing on the to-do list for this year was get a REAL tan - without the cancer. I'm white. Not just white, I'm practically see-through. Vampire-borderline-albino white. The sun literally hates me. Or visa versa. We're working on our relationship slowly, and after 4 days of trying my very hardest to go brown I'm proud to announce I'm a whole shade darker than I was on Sunday. Off-white with a touch of pink I'd call it.. To make matters worse, my son has also been spending time in the sun frolicking in our povo blow up pool in the nude, lathered in sunscreen and only for half the amount of time I have been trying and he has developed this beautiful golden sun-kissed look. Very frustrating for us albinos who have been slaving it out in the scorching conditions to get one shade of darkness.. So as I sit here typing, I've also applied a very light layer of self tanner to try and make myself look like I actually have been in the sun. Slightly cheating, yes, but when you look good you feel good so a little fake tan never hurt anyone. Unless your Lindsay Lohan, stay away from it honey.

Saving money is the pits!! I have 2 weddings to travel to this year, a trip to America to fund and a possible trip to Thailand, and hopefully a shopping trip to Melbourne. Im also saving for a boob job, nose job, teeth job, and liposuction.. Just gamon. But serious... So far, all this whole "saving money" resolution has done is made my online shopping addicition worse. I can't stop myself. I want everything. Shoes, clothes, jewellery! Gimme gimme.. Note to Josh Goot here - please be less expensive, I love you and want all of you but you are so far out of reach it makes me sick. The same goes for Tony Bianco, Maurie and Eve, Balmain, Sass and Bide, Bassike, Viktoria and Woods and Isabel Mirant - to name a few. I'm sure I've spelt a couple of those wrong, but if I could actually afford for you to be hanging in my wardrobe I'd probably know how you were spelt.. Think about that!

Final resolution is to blog more. I have lots to say.. But my baby is calling and I need to get my white ass to the gym, and to the supermarket to get food - wouldn't it be nice if food was free! Then I could spend that weekly $400 on clothes, not food. So today was short and sweet.. Love to all, just wanted to make sure you hadn't forgotten about me! Keep up with the resolutions, next year you will have wished you started today..